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How to Dress to Get Laid

Posted by The Girl's Guide to Depravity in How-To

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dresstogetlaid

Girls, time to ditch the push-up bra and trying-too-hard slut dress.   I live in Los Angeles, where things are decidedly more cazh, but I’ve found the outfit that makes me the most fuckable is a great pair of jeans and a tank that shows a generous amount of side boob, front boob, top boob or underboob.

Now, it’s not easy to find the perfect pair of jeans that makes my ass look perkier than a just-picked peach.  But Friday night I wore a pair from my friend’s new denim line, Schoen by Yu, (I was poured into The Ingenue, pictured above) and when I bent over to pick up my keys off the floor, the BF practically tore them off me, then tore into me.  I hadn’t felt his dick that hard since the new Star Wars movies were announced.  When we finished, I vowed then and there that the only time I would take off my favorite new pair of jeans would be sexy time.

And you can’t go wrong with a simple American Apparel tank over a lace bra.  My go-to is this tri-blend racer tank (I like to size up for ultimate side-boob action.)

P.S. If you want these amazing jeans at half the price, make a pledge on the official Schoen by Yu Kickstarter page!

Just The Tip…Of The Week: Don’t Tell Me To Touch Myself

Posted by The Girl's Guide to Depravity in advice, fuck, How-To, orgasms, sex

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woman-masturbating

Please don’t tell me to touch myself when we’re getting it on.

I don’t need to be the boss, but I’m not big on men making demands of me in the bedroom. I’d like to think that we’re equals, and if you have a specific request, there are reasonable ways to ask.

When we’re naked in bed and you’re kissing my neck and we’re about to take it to the next level, the quickest way to kill the mood is to whisper in my ear, “I want you to play with your pussy.” First of all, the word pussy is just…ugh. Don’t! Second, ordering me to masturbate on command makes me cringe. It’s pretty difficult to get me off unless you’ve been going down on me for a few minutes (or unless there’s a toy involved), but if you’re watching me rub myself and I feel like I have to put on a show, it’s the least pleasurable thing ever. It’s not going make me orgasm, and I’m a terrible actress, so all it’s going to do is make me look and feel stupid.

If I want to play with myself during sex, you’ll know…or you can just take charge and grab my vibrator out of my top drawer. That’s the guaranteed way to make me scream…and you don’t even have to ask!

Just The Tip…Of The Week” comes to you via SINGLE GIRL PROBLEMS, where you can read more of Elisabeth’s ramblings about sex, love and dating douchebags.