Currently browsing sex Category

Page 4 of 4

Sex Window

Posted by The Girl's Guide to Depravity in sex, window


My boyfriend has a “sex window.” Like he’ll get incredibly horny but if I don’t do something about it within oh, about a half-an-hour, he loses the urge to purge his spoodge. I never understood that. I’m like a car, once you turn me on, I’ll keep running until I’m out of gas … or you turn me off with something like incredibly disgusting toenails.

But to be fair, I have a sex window too — it looks out directly onto my neighbor’s bedroom, where I can see him getting it on with his boyfriend at practically all hours.

Sometimes it’s Sexier With Your Clothes On

Posted by The Girl's Guide to Depravity in clothes, fuck, sex


I know men are very visual mother-fuckers and love to see the whole butt-naked, spread-eagled package before they get down to business. But sometimes I think sex is so much hotter when most of your clothes are still on.

Maybe it reminds me of grade school when I had to sneak in a quickie with my first boyfriend before my mom made it to the top of the stairs with the milk and cookies, but there’s just something so very naughty about the simple unzipping of a fly, and pulling down of the panties before you stick it in that gets me nice and moist.

It’s like, you’re so hot for your guy, you can’t even wait for him to pull his pants down before you need to put the p in the v.

So ladies, the next time you’re gearing up for some sexy time with your man (or that random dirty hot dude who’s been eye-fucking you from the end of the bar), wear a skirt, ditch the knickers, and take nothing off before you get off.

Rule #33: Sometimes a Girl Just Needs a Good F*ck

Posted by The Girl's Guide to Depravity in dtf, fuck, sex


I have this friend, we’ll call her M, who is hot, smart, successful and totally DTF. But she can never find a guy who will give it to her good on a regular basis!

It seems like a woman who wants some NSA sex on a regular basis would be every guy’s dream, but instead, her encounters turn out to be a nightmare (he can’t get it up, he just wants to “cuddle”, etc.) Or the ones she meets who ARE willing to stick it to her good are usually some kind of fetish freaks. Hey, there’s nothing wrong with a little spanking, whipping and role-playing now and then, but she’s definitely not into the furries.

Are guys so intimidated by a girl who’s totally blunt about the fact that she just wants a good fuck that they can’t perform?

Well, if there ARE any dicks out there who willing, able, reasonably normal (looks-wise and sexual preference-wise) and in the LA area, post a link to your FB page and maybe she’ll hit you up.

Ask a Depraved Bitch

Posted by The Girl's Guide to Depravity in advice, depravity, Facebook, Formspring, Love, sex, Twitter


I’ve recently started answering your sick and sexy questions via Formspring, Facebook and Twitter.

Here’s a little taste of what kinda depravity I’ve been doling out:

Q: My boyfriend recently was injured, he has to wear a back brace when not in bed and an arm sling most of the time for the next 6 to 8 weeks. The doctors told him not to have sex or masturbate for at least 4 to 5 weeks because cumming might actually break his spine. After I was finished laughing I got reallt depressed. It’s been 1 week, neither of us are doing so well. Suggestions?

A: Just because he’s laid up doesn’t mean you can’t get laid! I assume his tongue isn’t in a sling? So sit down on his face and make him get to work!

Q: so me and my guy have been together for a year and we now live together, so sex used to be a frequent thing, now it only happens when HE wants it to happen. what about me? how can i get our sex life back to a mutual thing. -Christina

A: Christina — one question: how are your bj skillz? In my experience, no guy will refuse a hummer, no matter how tired he is. So get to work, then when it’s good ‘n ready, jump on that peen and do your business!

Q: How can you go from being fuck buddies to dating?

A: Right before he slips his peen between your thighs, just close your eyes and imagine you went to dinner first. Cuz that’s the only way you’ll ever get a fuck buddy to date you.

Have you got a question about sex, love or depravity? Ask me here: It’s anonymous!

On the Subject of Length…

Posted by The Girl's Guide to Depravity in bangover, length, sex


So there seems to be a common misconception among guys out there.  And it has to do with length.

No, not the length of their schlongs (I’ve already addressed that in “The Myth of Moby Dick”) but the length of the sexy time.

I’m a hit it and quit it type of girl — I like it hard, fast and wet.  But some guys think a girl wants slow romantic sex that lasts for hours!

Once I had sex for about 16 hours straight — of course we did it with the aid of pharmaceuticals — but after an all-night sex sesh, not only did I emerge from the room with the biggest beard burn you’ve ever seen (I looked like I had a chin herpe), but a bangover that lasted for days.

Now, I’m not saying I want a 60 second man, but I like a guy who comes hard and then cums hard in about 10 minutes.