I was at a wedding this weekend, and like a scene straight out of Wedding Crashers, someone stood up and gave a reading from Corinthians. You know — “Love is patient, love is kind. Love is not jealous, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.”
I wanted to stand up and say bitch, please, that is NOT the love I know!
The love I know is a mean, jealous bitch. The kind of girl who will steal your boyfriend and post semi-naked photos of them together on Facebook and “accidentally” tag you in them. (True story.) The kind of bitch who will Carrie Underwood a guy’s car if he even so much as glances in the direction of the hot bartender (even if he’s just trying to order a drink!)
So this Paul dude’s girl must have been a master at keeping her shit under wraps. Or he was on some biblical E trip when he wrote that letter to the Corinthians.
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