I may spend $200 bucks on denim that makes a guy think of nothing but getting in my back door when he sees how great they make my ass look, but there are only three explanations for a man wearing designer denim:
1. He’s gay.
2. He’s Persian/Russian/Italian/Armenian (insert your ethnic stereotype here).
3. He’s bad in bed.
I once went out with a guy who was wearing the trifecta of over-compensation: True Religion Jeans, Uggs and diamond studs in his ears.
I should have known better but I was horny, he was otherwise hot and my vibe was on the fritz. So I fucked him.
Correction — I sat on top of him for two pumps before he showed me an O-face uglier than the one your dog makes when he’s taking a shit.
And I’m not the only one who’s gotten fucked when she wanted to get screwed by a guy in designer denim. My friend T is particularly adept at attracting guys who sport girl-butt and it never works out for her. Usually all they want from her is a bj (she’s got amazing cock-sucking lips) but when she insists on doing the do, she either gets a guy with a tiny peen, a two-pump chump, or someone who can’t get off without a finger or a fist up his ass.
No wthis isnt true… I dated a guy who wore womens drainpipe jeans as he loved showing off his legs without going in shorts!
And he had a 10inch, was great in bed and was english.. oh, and he had lost most of his front teeth from a fight over 15 yrs previous so once he took them out with lights out he made my mind blow!!! Oh wow i tell you if a guy fancies munching on you.. it is nothing with lips or gentle teething! LOL
June 21, 2011 @ 11:15 pm
hahahaha…no, this is definitely true. a real man doesn't need to wear designer denim. he just…is
June 23, 2011 @ 12:31 pm
@BabyG1985: i'm not talking about emo/rocker skinny jeans, but the $250 true religions with the bedazzled pocket.
@Colleen: word.
June 23, 2011 @ 5:28 pm
Ha! If a dude isn't wearing Levi's…He's probably gay…or Polish.
August 1, 2011 @ 7:56 pm