Once I had this friend over at my apartment to watch a movie. Now when I say “friend” I mean “guy I wouldn’t fuck unless he was the last man on earth and my vibrator was broken.”
The DVD player in my living room was broken, so we had to watch it in the bedroom. As soon as the credits finished rolling, he wrapped himself around me like a boa constrictor.
“I’m not going to fuck you,” I said loudly, making sure he wasn’t getting any XXX ideas. ”Don’t worry, I don’t want to fuck — I just want to cuddle.”
I obviously thought this was just his way of getting me in bed (after all, spooning leads to forking), but he seemed sincere.
“Ok, but the minute you pop wood, I’m kicking you out.” ”Deal,” he said.
So we lie there for about the entire first half of the movie — and nothing. No wood. Not even a little chub. I started to get pissed. This had never happened to me before. Who the hell is he not to get turned on by having his dick pressed against my ass?
So I turned off the movie and fucked him.
Wait, who's the rapist?
June 10, 2010 @ 5:08 pm
LOL You're a fuckin champ. I woulda done the same
June 11, 2010 @ 5:41 pm
That'll teach him. Wow, so it's true, I should act like I don't like a girl, then she'll chase me??
June 11, 2010 @ 6:38 pm
Unfortunately this has happened to me, in my prettier days, and I tried to turn around and fuck him… he left. I think he was interested in something a little less chesty though according to his latest boyfriend. Oh well, he was a good cuddler and I'm sorry that I even tried.
June 11, 2010 @ 9:18 pm
How do I meet depraved women please? I'm never fortunate enough to find myself in these kind of situations!
June 15, 2010 @ 3:03 am
isn’t it extremely disingenuous to call this rape?
how about–why im a passive agressive nutcase who in one breath acuses a man of rape who doesn’t have sexual intentions, then essentially force myself on him out of frustration over not getting exactly what I didn’t want?
a shorter title could be “mindfuck: an exploration of the ‘depraved girl’ psyche
April 4, 2012 @ 6:48 pm
It’s “cuddle rape”, i.e., the act of forcibly cuddling another — not “rape” rape!
But love the new title suggestion! Will have to use that in a future post!
April 9, 2012 @ 3:58 pm
….Looks like everything went according to plans if you ask me hahaha
April 15, 2012 @ 8:22 pm